Dating in mid-life by Rebecca Perkins

I've tackled the topic of dating on the blog before. We think of online dating as something younger men do, but the proliferation of dating services for older people suggests that it's popular with all ages. I want to introduce you to a dating service that provides a full package, dating profile, photographs and much-needed advice to those unsure how to proceed. Hey Saturday is run by Saskia Nelson, photographer. She works with Rebecca Perkins, a dating profile expert, author and lifestyle coach. They help men and women create effective profiles and photographs for online dating (links at the end of this feature).

Rebecca Perkins and Saskia Nelson of Hey Saturday

I invited Saskia and Rebecca to tell us about their service and they offered to photograph me as if I were a client seeking a partner. The feature is illustrated with some of these images to give you an idea of a profile image (not because I'm dating!). I really enjoyed working with Saskia and Rebecca and can only suggest that you try this excellent dating service. I asked Rebecca to give some general advice to those who are dating in middle age and after:

Success online dating for the midlife man by Rebecca Perkins

So, you've got to mid-life and it's possible that online dating wasn't part of your life plan. But you're here and you can either put on your elasticated waist trousers and sweatshirt and settle down for old age or you can embrace the change, have some fun as well as learn a bit about yourself. Grey Fox writes about his search for style as he got older and how it gave him an enhanced sense of self. The work I do with men and women is all about improving self esteem and reinventing midlife so when he invited me to write about dating in midlife I was delighted.

"Get some great photos for your dating profile. Nothing screams can't be bothered more than a blurry selfie taken in the bathroom".

Online dating can feel both terrifying and exciting. You’ve no doubt heard plenty of horror stories from both male and female friends. Have you heard about the great successes too? Here's what I've learned during my time online dating in midlife: 

Use it as a time to get to know yourself a bit better. Know what's important to you in life. Spend some time thinking about your values, the things that act as your guide in life - integrity, open-mindedness, honesty, family… believe me it makes online dating much easier when you know what you’re looking for.

Image of Grey Fox by Saskia Nelson of Hey Saturday

Get used to feeling uncomfortable. Online dating for the first time can feel very uncomfortable. We often hide behind a lot of old beliefs being fearful of showing any vulnerability. Remember that we're all in the same boat and the moment you can be open and honest the easier it becomes.

Use good quality photographs for your dating profile. Nothing screams can't be bothered more than a blurry selfie taken in the bathroom. No one will take you seriously if you've not made some effort to get some decent portraits. Hey Saturday is a niche dating photography business and we understand the need for the best photos.

"Style is so much more than what clothes you wear, it's about becoming comfortable in your own skin, wearing the clothes that make you feel great about yourself". 

Do what makes you confident. What do you love doing? Do more of it. Divorce and the fall out can really knock our confidence and self esteem and it’s easy to slip into a closed off world where we feel ‘safe’. Taking steps out of our comfort zone is really important. Remember the things you loved to do and start getting busy again. Running, wood carving, furniture restoration, cycling, mountain biking…. whatever gives you a buzz make time for it every week.

Write a stand-out dating profile. I've read too many cliché ridden profiles in my time, believe me! You will be noticed among all the other profiles out there if you've made the effort. 

Image of Grey Fox by Saskia Nelson of Hey Saturday

My credo for an effective profile is 'show don't tell'. We all know that you've got a good sense of humour and that you like walking the dog or curling up with a glass of Merlot with the latest Indie film on Netflix.... but you can do so much better than that. A dating profile is your press release, it's your chance to show potential matches you on your very best day. You want to be saying, ‘hell yeah, I’d date me’ about your profile! I love working with clients to help them create their very own irresistible dating profile.

Style is so much more than what clothes you wear, it's about becoming comfortable in your own skin, wearing the clothes that make you feel great about yourself. I know from personal experience that when I'm wearing clothes, shoes, jewellery that makes me happy and feel good about myself I know I'm going to perform better, I'm going to feel more successful in life. The same goes for what you think and say about yourself. Do you speak nicely about yourself or do you give yourself a hard time?

Image of Grey Fox by Saskia Nelson of Hey Saturday

Give yourself the best chance of success. Make the effort now even before you’ve registered online by doing the things I’ve suggested. I know how daunting it can feel but it’s so well worth putting in the effort now. Do you need to get in shape? Lose a little weight around the middle? Could you do with a shopping trip to sort out your wardrobe? Could you do with spending a couple of sessions with a coach to sort out your self talk? Do you need to book yourself a session with a photographer? This is all about highlighting you, the new midlife version of you. Isn’t it worth it?

Links:

Hey Saturday

Irresistible Dating Profiles

Note by Grey Fox: This is an unsponsored feature. I invited Hey Saturday to write for the blog because I receive many comments from older women who are dating online that often men make little effort. This feature is not only for them, but for anyone contemplating dating: like anything in life,  you need to work at it.

Lumen Dating App for Over-50s

I've talked about dating before on the blog, looking at it largely from the point of view of dressing for a date. I'm now working with a new dating app for over-50s: Lumen was launched this week and I will be collaborating with them to give advice on matters of style and etiquette for those in the dating game. 

I accepted Lumen's invitation to work with them because of the quality of the team behind the app. I also know others working with them, indeed Rebecca Perkins (pictured below) has written here on the blog (link below).

Lumen is a joint venture from Antoine Argouges, former product manager and Head of Revenue at Match.com, Badoo, and Bumble, and renowned dating industry expert Charly Lester. Charly previously worked at the Guardian as their Dating Editor, and is the creator of The Dating Awards – industry awards for the online dating industry which focused on safety, customer service and consumer experience. 

I like sometimes to look at matters other than those relating to style. Furthermore, collaborative arrangements like this help me to allay blog costs while keeping content relevant to the subject of age, a constant theme here on the blog.

Rebecca Perkins (L) who has written about dating here on the blog (link below)

Unlike many brands, Lumen recognises the size and power of the older demographic and this lies at the heart of the launch of a dating app for this age group. Lumen has looked hard at the expectations of older daters and takes great care to verify profiles, which are expected to be detailed and to contain at least three photos. The app encourages meaningful conversations to help the communication process.

The Lumen team

The app has received £3.5 million investment from Andrey Andreev, the dating titan behind Badoo and Bumble. Andrey said “Do a search of the phrase ‘over 50s dating’. The results that come up are embarrassing for the industry. The over-50s have been mistreated by the dating sites for years. I’m excited to see the Lumen team launching an app which finally listens to this audience and specifically targets their issues and needs.’

Lumen is available to users in the UK and can be downloaded now, free of charge, from the App Store and Google Play Store. This feature is part of a collaboration with Lumen. My writing and advice will be appearing regularly on the app.

For previous features about dating here on the blog, click here.

Where are the stylish older men? Internet dating - the woman's viewpoint Part 1

Internet dating is now big. But, despite its growth, I've been hearing a lot from woman friends of their disappointment at the poor efforts made by older men when dating. As a representative of the man over forty, I decided to find out more. What is the woman's experience? Where are men going wrong? What advice can be given to the older man looking to date successfully?

It's important that a man, younger or older, makes an effort with appearance when dating (Image Ste Johnson)

This e-mail is typical of the comments I've had from women of forty or more -

At the ripe old age of 44 - and with three small children -  I recently decided to dip my toe into the murky waters of internet dating. 

I was anxious and excited at the same time but there seemed to be a rather depressing recurring theme online. Most of the men I fancied were a good ten years younger than me. They were the ones who stood out from the crowd - presenting themselves with a decent haircut, a smart shirt or cool t-shirt,  some kind of "style" that said they still cared about their appearance. I wasn't specifically looking for someone who worked in fashion, or who was even particularly fashionable, but the men in my age bracket seemed to be stuck in some kind of sartorial rut. 

So I chatted to my other single forty-something friends about it and it seemed to be a common problem. Where are all the stylish single 40-something men? How difficult can it be to purchase a decent pair of straight-leg jeans, a grey or navy t-shirt or sweatshirt and a smart pair of trainers? This is not cutting edge fashion - it's just a smart, simple, casual and classic look that is easy to achieve whether it's from Top Man or Liberty. 

Do men reach a certain age and give up on looking after themselves? I would have thought most single men would be trying to make the most their looks especially as let's face it, with internet dating, you have one chance to make a good first impression and whether you agree with it or not, it's going to be based on your profile photos first and foremost. 

I discussed these matters with Grey Fox contributor, Sarah Gilfillan and she agreed to carry out a survey of women over 40 (contacted through Twitter, Facebook or social contacts) who've tried internet dating. We wanted to see what view they took of the men they met - were they trying hard enough? What could they do better? Is there any advice we can give here on Grey Fox?

'With internet dating you have one chance to make a good impression'

We'll give you the results of the survey, and some advice, later this week. Meanwhile, please let us have your thoughts and experiences, either by commenting below or by e-mailing greyfoxblogATgmailDOTcom.

NOTE: I'd like to thank Ste Johnson for his permission to use the images in this Internet Dating series. To see more of his wonderful work visit his website here.

An internet dating survey: where are all the stylish older men? Part 2

In a previous post, Where are all the stylish older men? I revealed that women over 40 feel that many men they meet while internet dating make little effort over their appearance and style.

Fascinated by such complaints, Grey Fox contributor, Sarah Gilfillan, carried out a survey to find out more so that we could advise the older man how to prepare for an internet date.

Image Ste Johnson

This is Sarah's report on the information she gathered -

I sent out a short survey to find out how women liked to see guys over 40 dressed and I thought it would be interesting to share the results with Grey Fox readers. 

In general terms, when asked how they liked their man to dress, women want to see a man looking smart, groomed, and wearing good quality, well-fitting clothing. There seemed to be a slight leaning towards soft tactile fabrics - like cashmere sweaters, velvet jackets and soft brushed cotton shirts - all the better to cuddle up to! 

It was pretty clear what they didn't like on their guys over 40: baggy jeans, bright logo tees, trainers, and poorly-fitting clothes. Men tend to wear over-large garments, which looks sloppy. There were a few comments about mismatched items - either in terms of colour/pattern/fabric or the styles ie: walking trousers and a smart shirt.

No one thought guys over 40 should stop wearing jeans, as long as they're dark, smart, fit well and are not too faded, ripped, skinny, or showing pants! Worn with a smart, plain t-shirt, polo shirt or casual shirt and perhaps a v-neck or half zip sweater, most felt that jeans are good weekend staples.

Many favoured boots for casual wear as an alternative to trainers - desert boots, Chelsea boots, Redwing boots all came up as ones they liked. The other favourite was the ever popular pair of brogues.

For a smarter look - going out for dinner - nearly all said smart jeans again, or trousers/cords and a shirt, possibly with a smart jacket and worn again with brogues or smart shoes. Interestingly, only one person said a suit. 

Nearly all of the women asked said that grooming was very important, but not overly groomed TOWIE style (which they found a complete turn off)! Most preferred clean-shaven, but some were happy with a beard as long as it was not too long or scruffy. All said regular haircuts were a must - even if there's not much left, it needs to be neat round the edges. Other aspects mentioned were tidying up nose and ear hair, and clean short nails - fingers and toes!! 

Image Ste Johnson

There were mixed views on aftershave - one said "lots so it wafts" and some said it wasn't important. It generally seemed that the ladies did like some sort of scent (I guess to denote that you're fresh and clean) but not to go overboard. 

One of the other things that cropped up was the importance of accessories, helping to make an outfit look groomed and smart and also contributing to a more modern, youthful look when chosen carefully. Colourful socks, good quality belts, bags and wallets plus hats - either flat caps/baker boy style/trilby (maybe as a distraction from thinning hair?) were items mentioned. 

Some of the brands the guys bought and the ladies liked were Nudie, Eton, Tiger of Sweden, Armani, Ralph Lauren, Joseph, Redwing, CP Company and Levi's. 

The overall conclusion was that simple, smart, classy and well fitted clothes work. You don’t need to try to be too young or fun, just find your own style and make sure it fits well! Update your look with interesting, quality accessories to keep it fresh and modern.

Every woman, bar one, said that it made their man more attractive to them when they were better dressed. Good advice!

But if you are feeling intimidated by this or think it's shallow, you might be cheered by the couple of girls who said "he's a bit of a scruff, but I love him" and "I knew I was marrying a scruffy muppet so no problem!" I would still argue though that you should get ahead in the dating game by not being a "scruffy muppet" but dressing well and giving yourself an edge over all the other men.

So, gentlemen, whatever you may think, the women's perception is that older men entering the dating game aren't trying their best. As one woman remarked, "We make all the effort only to find that the man hasn't even tried to look presentable".

Next week, in the final part of this series, we'll summarise with advice for the older man preparing for a date.

NOTE: I'd like to thank Ste Johnson for his permission to use the images in this Internet Dating series. To see more of his wonderful work visit his website here.

Fears Launches Rectangular Watch to Celebrate 175 Years

Fears Watches, who are celebrating their 175th anniversary (they have launched a book about the brand - see link below), have introduced a rectangular watch inspired by a 1930s Fears art deco timepiece. The Archival 1930 uses new-old-stock movements dating from the 1930s and 1960s which are overhauled and assembled in the U.K. 

One of the two new Fears Archival watches

I was able to look closely at the two watches recently and was impressed by the quality of the finish of dial and case. They are launched at a time when rectangular watches seem to be sought after among watch lovers. While vintage in character, there is something very contemporary about the simplicity of their styling.

I was wearing a 1930s Jaeger LeCoultre when I met Nicholas Bowman-Scargill, head of Fears, recently to see the new watches. I wasn't previously aware of their rectangular shape and it was coincidental that I was wearing a similar watch, but the fact that I was doing so was illustrative of the recent rise in popularity of the shape, evidenced by interest in rectangular timepieces such as the Jaeger LeCoultre Reverso, Cartier and others.

Fears Archival watches with '30s Jaeger LeCoultre and Fears's Nicholas Bowman-Scargill

The curved profile case of the Fears Archival watch is machined from 316L stainless steel and preserves the proportions of, while being slightly larger than, the 1930s original. A ‘Vintage Champagne’ dial is set off by a contrasting polished 18ct yellow gold border and crisp black Art Deco-style numerals and minute track. The simple blued hands are solid versions of the ‘Fears’ shape watch hands and feature a central bevel with diamond polishing on either side. 

All the sizes and proportions have been carefully thought out and tweaked in order to achieve just the right appearance. In watch design it's remarkable how even tenths of a millimetre can make a discernible difference to a watch's appearance and it wasn't simply a case of scaling up from the slightly smaller vintage original (see the image below).

The 1930s original Fears (left) alongside the two new models (not exactly to scale)

Each watch has a vintage-style handmade Oxblood Red calf leather strap tanned in Bristol by Thomas Ware & Sons, Britain’s oldest vegetable tanner who created the leather for Fears’ watch straps when the original watch was made in 1930.

The Archival 1930 is limited to 175 pieces (for the 175th anniversary) and there are two models, the first of which has been donated to the Bristol Museum for their permanent collection. They differ in the movements that power them, with the two-handed Archival 1930 (136 watches) using a new old stock manual winding movement dating from the 1960s. The three-handed Archival 1930 Small Seconds (39 pieces) uses a new old stock manual winding movement dating from the 1930s. Both are movements that Fears used in the past. Each is new/old stock and has undergone a full re-build and received an upgraded mainspring to enhance reliability. 

Which would you choose? In appearance, the two-handed (far right in the picture above) is the simpler and therefore more contemporary looking. While it's obviously a personal choice, I rather like the three-hander (centre above) for its seconds hand, its proportions, the older movement and the fact that there will be fewer of them.

Priced at £3500 and £3950, these limited edition, made in England, watches are available from Fears Watches.

See here for a feature on the recently published history of Fears.

Dressing for a date: advice to a man

This is the long-awaited conclusion to a series I wrote last year, with much help from female readers and from the blog's own Sarah Gilfillan. It followed many complaints from women about the lack of effort made by men (older men in particular) on dates. 

The complaints are discussed in the previous blog posts on internet dating, for which, click here. The solutions the the problems discussed are self-evident, but below I've set out some Grey Fox pointers for the older man dating in middle age or later.

Dressing and preparing for a date:

1. Show that you care by demonstrating that you've tried hard with your appearance. You may not always get it right - the woman won't be expecting David Gandy - it's the effort and the thought that counts.

2. The same goes for the photo that you use online. Don't use an image of you in your budgie smugglers on the beach last year, from your employers' website, or picking up your degree certificate 20 years ago - select a photo that shows you as you are now in smart but casual clothes. 

3. Wear smart, good quality, clean and, above all, well-fitting clothing - jackets, good quality knitwear. Go for smart casual with style. 

4. Avoid busy, mismatching clothes. If in doubt, select plain, well-cut styles. 

5. Accessories can add to a stylish look, showing that you've thought about your appearance. 

6. Soft tactile fabrics go down well.

7. Wear good shoes. Poor or dirty/worn footwear will spoilt any look. 

8. If you go for jeans, wear dark raw denim that fits well and isn't artificially distressed. 

9. Good grooming is essential. Clean, scrubbed, smelling nice, minimal excess hair. 

10. Are your teeth well looked-after and clean? If your breath smells, visit a dentist, get advice, use a breath-freshening mouthwash such as the excellent Ultra Dex.

11. If in doubt, get style advice from a knowledgeable friend, a stylist like our own Sarah Gilfillan of Sartoria Lab or read a good men's style blog like Grey Fox Blog. 

12. Make an effort; you can be sure that your date will have done. Show self-respect, and respect for her, by trying your best. It's not my place to tell you how to behave during the date, but show interest, ask questions, don't just talk about yourself. 

13.Enjoy yourself! 

Finally, I want to add the anonymous comments of a female reader of Grey Fox Blog. Read, learn and digest:

"We all want to be loved for being ourselves, but if you don't love and respect yourself first then how can you really love and appreciate someone else, let alone be able to bring something meaningful to a relationship, especially as you get older? I'm not talking vanity here, just simple respect for self. 

The way we dress in part reflects all of the above, and one of the benefits of getting older is the feeling of freedom to wear what you want, when and where you want. Knowing that mini skirts are sadly long gone, you don’t have to slavishly follow fashion, but can now wear your personality on your sleeve - what suits you. 

If someone neglects their appearance (and it needn't involve big expense, often more time) it's a real turn off on especially on a date. I immediately think, 'nursemaid'. 

No-one’s perfect but it’s important to make the best of what you have and a well dressed man or woman is a joy to behold! It’s just common sense.

.

PS My sister who’s in her late 60’s and travels a lot, often in a shocking pink wool coat, gets so many positive comments from all sorts of people. Mostly around, ‘You’ve bought happiness to my day."

Come on guys, follow Grey Fox and you’ll get it right!"

With many thanks to Sarah Gilfillan, Ste Johnson, talented illustrator, who produced the images and the many readers who helped with this piece.

Menswear Classics 2: The Denim Blouson Jacket

One lesson I've learned from my eight and a half year search for style is that style preconceptions are often wrong. I've never worn a denim jacket and assumed I never would. However, a post on Instagram (link below) produced much interest and a comment by menswear writer Eric Musgrave prompted a search for a particular jacket, the Lee Storm Rider (Lee 101LJ). I found a vintage (probably seventies) example and loved it so much that I hunted down two more Lee jackets, the 101J and 100J - from which you can tell that in the space of a lockdown week I'd become a denim enthusiast.

Three vintage Lee denim jackets, Rider 101J (70s), Storm Rider 101LJ (70s?), Westerner 100J (60s)

The blanket-lined Lee Storm Rider (70s?)

The story of the denim jacket is largely an American one, although workwear cotton twill was a specialism of English cotton mills from the eighteenth century. Denim's American origins lie in the mid to late nineteenth century when Levi Strauss started his business producing overalls and jeans from riveted denim. Rivals Wrangler and Lee appeared in the early decades of the last century. 

With its origins as durable work wear, denim was adopted by industrial and farm workers and this rugged image attracted a popular following from the fifties. The jeans and the cropped denim blousons so loved by cowboys became badges of youth and cool, being worn by many music and Hollywood stars, among them Kirk Douglas, Elvis Presley, Steve McQueen and Paul Newman. And women wore them too - Marilyn Monroe wearing her Lee Storm Rider jacket in The Misfits.

Marilyn Monroe in The Misfits in a Lee Storm Rider

Paul Newman in the Lee Storm Rider

The two main players for denim jackets were Levi Strauss & Co. with the Trucker and H. D. Lee with the 101J Rider and Storm Rider (a blanket-lined version for colder weather). Levi's produced their first denim blouson in 1905 and Lee followed in 1931. Other brands soon copied the basic blouson pattern with two breast pockets and (coming later) two additional  hand-warmer pockets. This style has endured, fuelled by its workwear and celebrity wearer history. Of course denim jackets come in other styles too, but that's another story.

The founding brands like Levi's and Lee still make essentially the same models as those introduced early in the last century. The rise of Japanese denim brands and the elevation of the cloth to luxury fashion status hasn't altered the basic appearance of most denim garments. They are still worn as workwear, particularly in the US, but are also worn by the rich and the less so, by the cool and fashionable and the less so. Jeans and denim jackets have become classics of men's and women's wear. 

Styling a denim jacket

Some associate the denim blouson with hardened denim dudes wearing double denim and agitating over the minutiae of denim manufacture and construction. But mixed with more formal and tailored styles the denim jacket can come into its own. Style your jacket, however new or battered, with chinos or tailored trousers, shirt (and even a tie) or roll neck and brogues or loafers and you achieve a smart casual look where garments at opposite poles of the style spectrum surprisingly complement each other.

Whatever you do don't, as I did until recently, write off the denim jacket, particularly if you're older. Your age has nothing to do with it: denim has been around longer than anyone alive. A word of warning though, it's easy to get sucked into the world of vintage denim. It's a sustainable way of buying clothes and nothing beats a naturally patinated denim garment (pre-distressed denim is a cheat), but that way obsession lies.

I bought two of my jackets from Rokit vintage and I recommend them; they seem to know what they are talking about. The third, a seventies Lee Rider, I bought on eBay where you need to know what you're looking for to be sure of a bargain.

As you move back through the sixties and earlier, jackets become rare and increasingly costly. Dating isn't straightforward so be very cautious about the claimed dates of jackets on sale. Some advice about history and dating can be found online and this is often very helpful (see here for example) but, as with any information found online, don't treat it as gospel.

Reading: history and style inspiration: There are many books on denim and its history. These are the books I've used:

Denim Dudes - Amy Leverton

Denim Style - Horst A. Friedrichs

The Fashion Resource Book: Men - Robert Leach

Icons of Men's Style - Josh Sims

See also the Instagram post which started off my interest and in which I asked, 'Would you wear a denim jacket?'

See also Menswear Classics 1: The Overcoat

A Revamped Blog and a Wider Approach to Style

Grey Fox Blog is nearly seven years old and is long overdue a revamp. As a largely unsponsored blog I wanted the redesign to pay for itself and, while it's taken some time, I'm pleased to say that recent collaborative projects on behalf of a number of brands have enabled me to do this. This has resulted in a slight change in the blog's focus to reflect the wider lifestyle character of these brands.

Working with Maserati earlier this year

I'd love to talk more about menswear style. I'm not interested in reprinting press releases about menswear collections - I want to wear clothes from quality men's brands and show readers how they can be styled here and on Instagram. This last year has made me realise that this isn't going to happen. I work collaboratively with a few menswear brands, to whom I'm very grateful, but most expect me to promote them without compensation and I find this increasingly difficult to do. 

Most of what I do on the blog is uncompensated. Blogging costs me time and money. I am not a fashion journalist with a wage and expense account. For these reason I cannot buy products to review them (as one eyewear brand suggested I do) or to pay courier charges and photographers' fees for photoshoots. Sadly several menswear brands have been unable to help me with these costs over the last year, reflecting I'm sure the difficult fashion and clothing market.

So, I've been working over the last year with brands covering a wider range of products including cars, accessories, holidays, English sparkling wine, watches, even a dating app for over-50s. I've done this not only because they've helped me to fund the blog and to cover my costs but also because they are brands that fit with a basic but developing theme of the blog: ageing with style. 

Style is not just how you look and what you wear: it's how you live - where you go on holiday, what car you drive, the watch you wear, what food and drink you like, what you do in your spare time, how you treat others, what books you read. Luxury and high cost don't necessarily equate with style (look at the appalling tastes of many of the world's richest) so I try to look at products of all price points as long as they're well-made, well-designed and stylish.

I want to develop this ageing with style theme. Some 47% of consumer spending is by those over 50, but the older demographic is largely ignored. I hope this isn't the reason why I've found it hard to feature as much menswear as I'd like, but, whatever, I aim to provide a resource for the older man looking, like me, for style. 

Finally I want to thank those brands who've supported the blog over the last year - both menswear and more general lifestyle brands. I hope you enjoy the slightly wider scope of the blog, As ever I value your feedback and comments. Please e-mail me for more information, with questions, thoughts or suggestions or for a Media Pack (which explains how I work with brands to our mutual benefit).

A Grey Fox Christmas Gift Guide

As we enter December, I’m on the look-out for Christmas gifts and will bring some suggestions over the next week or two. Details below.

From top left clockwise: Regular readers will know I love to support small brands and I recently came across a new business making a luxury scented candle just for men: the Seven Scents Man’dle (top left). The Seven Scents brand was created earlier this year at the school gates by two mums looking for a stylish candle made with quality organic fragrance. Produced in small batches in Leicestershire to guarantee the highest quality control, the Mand’le fragrance is a delicious Cuban Tobacco & Oak. 

Another interesting company is Jayjee, a luxury British waistcoat brand (middle top) founded in 2016 by Indian fashion designer, Jaysree Pawar who, working together with her husband, aims to inject spice and colour into the British gentlemen’s wardrobe. Jayjee’s flagship product is the double-sided Nehru waistcoat, one side made from beautiful colourful handwoven cotton Ikat fabric and the reverse from the highest quality plain or herringbone English wool. The finest cotton Ikat fabric is dyed in India using a technique dating back to the 12th Century before being hand-made and manufactured in London, England.

I’m also excited by the success of another partnership, Donhall & Bell, the brainchild of Londoners Peter Mulhall and Martin Bell who got together five years ago to offer men a sleek, modern slipper (top right) as an alternative to mainstream footwear. 

If you'd like to give a touch of Italian luxury in a Christmas stocking try the rather fetching Carl Friedrik briefcase, (middle) designed with Scandinavian minimalism in mind. Carl Friedrik’s Vallance briefcase comes in a variety of colours and can be matched with wallet and laptop case. 

Gift vouchers have the great advantage of allowing the recipient to select their own gift. Peter Macdonald of Empire's Union is a tailor whose made to measure service I've used myself and I can vouch for his care, quality and stylish input into anything he makes. You can make a gift of a voucher (bottom right) for his services. More information at Empire's Union. 

I've featured Sarah Gilfillan of Sartoria Lab on the blog before. She's one of the most talented menswear stylists I've come across and a voucher will buy her professional advice for a man (or woman) looking for help with their shopping/wardrobe or styling. Very highly recommended. Sartoria Lab (bottom middle).

Finally, these cufflinks from EDG London (bottom left) are designed and made in the UK.

All these gifts were selected by me - many thanks for the brands for their help in providing images and information

Exploring Bespoke 2: The Choice of Materials with Brita Hirsch Tailor

In the first instalment of this fortnightly series exploring the elements of true bespoke tailoring, I introduced my collaboration with bespoke tailor Brita Hirsch to explore and describe the skills of bespoke tailoring by designing and making a Norfolk jacket made from Harris tweed. Any such project starts with selecting the best materials. 

The inspiration and the end product - choice of materials is the first important step

Brita takes up the story:

"First stop on the journey to a truly bespoke coat is finding the right material: choosing it wisely is key to everything I do. When it comes to fine cloth and rustic tweed, I'm fortunate to have the world’s best producers on my door step: the best fine wool cloth available to the global market is still produced in the long established woollen mills of West Yorkshire, only an easy drive away from my workshop in Macclesfield. I source my fine worsteds, frescoes and flannels from the knowledgable local cloth merchants who work closely with these mills.  

Scotland, with its accomplished hand weavers, is not far away, either, and I buy my tweeds directly from them. Courtesy of Harris Tweed Hebrides, David was the proud owner of a length of beautiful, conker coloured, richly textured tweed. His idea was to have a coat that is steeped in tradition, a Norfolk jacket, tailored for him.

Harris tweed from the Harris Tweed Hebrides mill (L) and the Adamley design for the silk lining (R)

A classic coat for outdoor pursuits, the Norfolk calls for a lining that is hard wearing, breathable and quintessentially British to perfectly complement the weather-resistant tweed. It might come as a surprise to some, but not to the connoisseur, that the material of choice is silk. The toughest natural fibre available, coming with a molecular structure that is similar to that of wool, silk combines toughness with excellent climate balancing properties, whilst being soft and lightweight. 

But what about the 'quintessential British' part? Well. Macclesfield, in official UNESCO terms the Western end of the historic Silk Road, is home to wonderful silk printers Adamley Textiles. The company supplies many of the big names in the fashion world with the most beautiful silk fabrics and is proud guardian of the David Evans [no relation to Grey Fox's David Evans!] archive of graphic print designs. What, then, could be more appropriate than to use a silk lining for the Norfolk and let David pick the design for his custom print?"

So, we selected tweed and silk as the main materials of the coat. I told the story of Harris tweed here so there's no need to repeat it here. Brita mentions the silk lining from Adamley Textiles. I was surprised when she suggested a silk lining to the coat as I hadn't understood just how tough a cloth it makes, but its robustness, ability to take bright designs and colours and its breathability make it an ideal lining material. Brita and I visited Adamley in Macclesfield (for centuries at the heart of the English silk industry - see images below). 

Brita and I look through the David Evans silk design archives at Adamley in Macclesfield

Screen printing at Adamley Textiles

I looked through dozens of old archive books and I selected a fox head silk dating from first half of the last century. Adamley very generously redrew and printed off a few meters of silk, using the traditional silk screen method, for the lining introducing the colours we specified to go with the conker-coloured Harris tweed. In a future feature I'll show just how perfectly this lining matches the tweed.

The next in this series will be the measuring and cutting stages of the bespoke process.

For other features in the Exploring Bespoke series here on the blog, click here.

Links:
Brita Hirsch of Hirsch Tailoring
Adamley Textiles
Harris Tweed Hebrides
The Harris Tweed Authority
My trip to Harris Tweed: A Journey to the Heart of the Hebrides

With thanks to photographer Fiona Bailey whose images appear throughout this project.

Michlmayr: Wristwatch Repair and Servicing

I recently had one of my watches serviced (at no charge to me, see note below*) by Norwich-based watchmakers, Michlmayr. My wristwatch collection is smaller than it used to be, but I like to ensure that they are kept well maintained. 

Servicing and repairing a mechanical watch (or a clock) is a cost that needs to be factored into watch ownership, but is an expense only required perhaps every 5-10 years and, if done regularly, maintains the value of the timepiece while keeping it running as accurately as when new.

My early 90s Tudor 'Big Block' chronograph beautifully serviced by Michlmayr

Michlmayer was established in 1986 and now has a team of qualified and experienced watch and clockmakers providing services to private clients, to the public sector and cathedrals and churches repairing, servicing and restoring wristwatches and clocks. They kindly offered to service one of my watches and I selected a Tudor 'Big Block' 79170 chronograph dating from the early 90s which, while it was running well, was due a clean and a lube.

I suspect that many owners have little idea of the wonders that lie inside their mechanical watches. The Tudor has a workhorse Valjoux 7750 movement with little decoration but a truly utilitarian beauty. I'm grateful to Michlmayr for taking the following images for me. It's when you see the complexity of these movements that you begin to understand the skills, expertise and the cost of servicing. What the images don't show is just how small some of the parts are - yet an experienced watchmaker handles the tiny components with remarkable confidence and dexterity.

Michlmayr have done a superb job. I asked them not to polish the case (which they will do if required) as I prefer it to be kept as original as possible. The watch was returned to me running well within 5 seconds a day (and this isn't a chronometer movement). A bent secondhand was replaced with a Tudor replacement and the watch looks superb, now acting as my daily wearer.

Finding a reliable watchmaker can be hard, but I'm pleased to recommend Michlmayr highly on the basis of this experience. To find out about their watch and clock services or to book a service go to Michlmayr

*Note: At my request Michlmayr serviced my watch without charge and I agreed to objectively review their services here on my blog.

My Tudor 'Big Block' chronograph 79170 before the service

Grey Fox Blog on Instagram

I've been taking a much-needed short break from the blog, but have been working hard in the background and will be back very soon with features on outdoor clothing, dating and the usual posts on style for men of maturity and taste. 

Meanwhile, you can always follow me on Instagram, where I usually post several times a day. Over the last few months I've been delighted to have been named as an Instagram account to follow by the FT's How to Spend It, Shortlist and others. You will find me at GreyFoxBlog.

Blancpain Fifty Fathoms Tribute Dive Watch

Back in my watch collecting days I nearly bought an unusual but handsome diving watch which, like many of the best watches, had a highly practical and military background. It was a Blancpain Fifty Fathoms (see image below). Those of you with a nautical background will know that a fathom is a naval measurement of depth and is six feet, so fifty fathoms is 300 feet, or just under 100 metres, the depth to which the watch could be dived.

The original Blancpain Fifty Fathoms on a military strap

Dating originally to the early fifties, the Fifty Fathoms was later adopted by the French and US military who demanded a water tightness indicator on the dial. This is the two-part circle at the bottom of the dial which changes colour if water gets into the watch case. This became a well-known characteristic of the watch and has been reproduced on the military-style tribute watch which Blancpain has launched.

In common with many other brands, Blancpain has delved into its archives and produced a tribute to the original watch. I'm pleased to say that they've kept the watch to a reasonable size, 40mm, roughly the size of the original, rather than making it too large (image below).

The Blancpain Fifty Fathoms Tribute

While the proportions of dial to bezel are slightly different to the original, the tribute retains the minimalist and easily legible nature of the original. Watches like this which are designed for a practical purpose generally result in attractive and uncluttered designs. Like the original, the tribute has an automatic movement (Blancpain realised in the early fifties that hand-winding a watch compromises water resistance) which is made in-house and is water resistant to 300 metres (as opposed to the original's 300 feet).

On inspection, it's a beautifully made and robust watch. It also has a transparent case back to enable you to see the movement; a fascinating part of any watch and usually hidden from sight. It's available on a NATO strap (true to its military origin), steel bracelet or sailcloth strap. A watch that would look good with casual or businesswear, on the beach or in the board room. It's available in a limited run of 500 priced at £10,310. See Blancpain for more information.

This feature is unsponsored.

Tudor Black Bay 58 Navy Blue: Tudor's Newest

One of the characteristics of a watch enthusiast is that s/he will rarely wear a watch for longer than a few days before switching to something different. I used to collect vintage watches and, until last December, I would, every four or five days, swap the timepiece on my wrist for something else in my now tiny collection. That was until I bought a Tudor Black Bay 58 just before Christmas. 

My Black Bay 58 alongside Tudor's new 'Navy Blue'

That watch has been firmly on my wrist for both work and play. What attracted me to it was that it was new, and wearing vintage watches in the rough and tumble of an active life isn't advisable, but it also that it's good value, robust, has a chronometer movement and was from a brand I used to collect during my watch collector days.

And now Tudor has launched a new Black Bay 58: the Navy Blue. It differs from the original BB58 (sometimes called the 'gilt') only in that it has a blue dial and bezel, but these changes make it a different watch. While the gilt BB58 has a vintage air, reminiscent of its 1950s ancestor, with gold highlights and cream numerals, the Navy Blue has a very contemporary feel - simpler in design - with a smoky blue bezel and ice white numerals. This variation gives the buyer the opportunity to select according to his/her style preferences.

The two Tudor Black Bays (centre) continue a tradition going back decades. Here they are pictured with
 a Tudor chronograph and diver's watch both dating from the seventies

I was able to borrow a Navy Blue and wear it alongside my own watch. I wear mine on the excellent Tudor bracelet, but the new watch arrived on a matching blue nylon strap which is comfortable and gives an alternative and utilitarian look. Whether you prefer the vintage look of the original BB58 or the cleaner look of the Navy Blue is up to you. I would find it hard to select between the two if I had that choice - maybe the solution would be to buy both!

Tudor took a shrewd step introducing 39mm versions of its standard 41mm Black Bay diver's watches. Two millimetres may not sound much, but in watch terms it gives a slimmer, more compact and lighter timepiece. The move to smaller watches results partly from the growth in the vintage watch market. From the early days of wristwatches until the nineties most watches rarely exceeded 40mm in diameter. 

The Tudor Black Bay 58 Navy Blue in action

Until recently Tudor were seen, not entirely fairly, as a sort of poor man's Rolex. They used off-the-peg rather than the in-house movements made by Rolex, but their design was as good and even occasionally ahead of Rolex (they produced an automatic chronograph before Rolex and the 'snowflake' shaped hands used then and now on their diver's watches were both legible and contemporary in design). Even today some watch dealers describe vintage Tudor watches as 'Rolex Tudor' to give the Tudor name a totally unnecessary gloss - they were and are excellent watches in their own right.  The latest Tudor watches have in-house chronometer movements, removing any last doubts that this is a quality watch brand. 

Comfortable to wear, my BB58 had remained accurate despite many months' constant wear in often rugged conditions, from being subject to the vibrations of off-road cycling on my gravel bike to being knocked around swimming in cold mountain streams. 

Is there anything I would change? I'd like a date to make this an even more useful, utilitarian timepiece. One could be included at 6 o'clock to preserve the symmetry of the dial, but that omission isn't a deal breaker for me. For anyone wanting a high quality, durable watch with a chronometer movement at a fair price, I recommend the Black Bay 58. Many agree, as the waiting lists for the first BB58 demonstrated.

For more information on these watches, see Tudor's informative website. 

This is an unsponsored post. I was lent the Black Bay 58 by Tudor to assess and review. All views expressed here are mine alone.

CWT - The Early Days of an Ethical British Brand

As regular readers will know, I like to bring news of new, small or little-known British brands. Here's one, CWT, that contacted me recently and sent me one of their t-shirts to try. 

CWT was set up during the first lockdown when manufacturing ground to a halt. The business is underpinned by a British manufacturing heritage dating back to 1972. They’re aiming to be a sustainable brand designing and producing simple, comfortable, steadfast essentials in England for both men and women through their unisex collections.

CWT manufacturing men's and women's clothes in the UK

As a start-up, they are at the beginning of their journey and are yet to build up their main lines. Their main products are very well-made t-shirts, but more products are planned and I thought it would be interesting to catch up with a new brand at this very early phase. I asked Karandeep Mattu to tell us more about the brand:

GF: Please introduce yourself and the brand - how long has it been going, where are you based?

KM: My family has been manufacturing and supplying high end brands with jerseywear in the Leicestershire countryside since 1972, and is now in the hands of the 3rd generation.

We started CWT in 2020 during lockdown when the factory was forced to pause. We had some free time on our hands so decided to create a brand founded upon our own values. We strive to provide a socially conscious product, with amazing quality, that invites a sense of community and responsibility. Our approach also allows us to combine traditional fabrics with modern manufacturing techniques to create products that will stand the test of time.

GF: What products do you make? Do you plan to expand your range?

KM: Jerseywear is our speciality, we have over 50 years of experience, knowledge and a vast range of suppliers we can draw from.

We have launched with our essential t-shirt, made from an extra-long staple cotton (Supima) grown on a Gossypium barbadense plant known for flowering very long silky cotton, also sourced from a third generation family owned farm in California USA. The yarn was then imported, knitted, dyed, cut and sewn all within a six mile radius of our sewing factory.

We have so many new pieces in the pipeline. However, next to launch will be our super heavy weight 100% organic cotton hoodie, which should be available online soon – keep your eyes peeled!

GF: Ethical and sustainable issues are mentioned as important on your website - please tell us how these are important and what steps you take on the issues. You mention, for example, the ETI Base Code - what is that and how does it work?

KM: The Ethical Trading Initiative (ETI) is a leading alliance of companies, trade unions and NGOs that promote respect for workers’ rights around the globe. Their vision is a world where all workers are free from exploitation and discrimination and enjoy conditions of freedom, security, and equality. The ETI is not the only element which is core to our beliefs. We also believe our products should not have a negative impact, therefore all of our t-shirts are carbon neutral. They are offset through different projects that not only counterbalance the production of carbon, but also have a positive social impact for the local population.

"We are a British brand and if we don’t support British knitters, sewing factories, dye houses, printing and embroidery plants, wash houses, yarn and thread suppliers, who will? Nobody!" 

GF: British manufacture is obviously important to you. Does this bring challenges in terms of sourcing materials, pricing goods and remaining competitive in the face of goods from overseas where ethical standards are not so high?

KM: British manufacturing is very important to us, we have been doing it for over 50 years and across 3 generations. We have seen good times but also bad, particularly during the early 2000’s when it seemed like every brand and retailer moved their production off shore.

It would be a lot easier for us as a brand to source our products from Portugal with their high quality, lower costs, shorter lead times, and good working conditions. However, we are a British brand and if we don’t support British knitters, sewing factories, dye houses, printing and embroidery plants, wash houses, yarn and thread suppliers, who will? Nobody! 

Our business isn’t built on selling the cheapest t-shirt, or the highest quality t-shirt at the lowest price, a low price means something has been neglected and usually it means paying low wages and low prices to farmers. It doesn’t have to be that way, we are selling the highest quality which will last longer at a fair price.

GF: Cotton has had a mixed press recently. You mention sustainability - how do you ensure that your materials and products are sustainable?

KM: Sourcing the right cotton from the right places - our products are all produced using the finest Supima cotton. 

Supima’s family of cotton growers are in the vanguard of innovation using and developing some of the most technologically advanced agricultural processes available. The farming practices employed set environmental and ethical standards for cotton around the world. The soil is the farmers’ productive capital, so great effort is made to maintain its fertility and increase its productivity. 

Farmers work hard to minimize inputs while maximizing crop yield. Examples of this include using laser levelled fields to maximise water efficiency, drip irrigation which feed directly to the plant only, annual rotations to help keep the soil nutrient levels in balance, using GPS guided tractors that keep the wheels on the same path as prior passes, etc.

GF: How do you see the future of the brand?

KM: Positive, we will continue to grow the range of jersey garments, and eventually expand into British knitwear and outerwear, and continue to deliver on our social and environmental goals.

For further information or to view the full CWT collections, please visit www.cwtstore.com

I was sent a grey marl t-shirt to try. Well-made from quality cotton, it's an ideal basic garment.