A reader asks - hats, beards and the balding older man

A reader asks (a series in which Grey Fox helps other older men in their search for style).....

Dear Mr Fox, 

Please accept compliments on your excellent blog (including links) which neatly coincides with my intended style. As you have probably already guessed I am a middle aged man who aspires to improve my dress. Currently I spend most of my life in jeans and technical clothing and have realised I need to tidy myself up. I am 59 years old, still fit thanks to a lifetime of cycling and athletics but grey-fine haired round the sides and bald on top as you will see on the photo.

My big problem(s):

1. Given the scarcity of it, I would very much value your opinion on what hairstyle and facial hair (if any) I should adopt. 
2. What style of hat should I consider instead of baseball caps and beanie hats? A strong Yorshire accent has made me wary of wearing flat caps.

The chaps on the Fashionbeans forum have given me some excellent help and advice so far on choosing classic clothing which I am pleased to follow especially as it is consistent with predominantly buying British. A member of that forum put me onto your blog. I very much look forward to your advice. 

Best regards

Andrew

Grey Fox replies.....

Dear Andrew, 

Forgive the delayed reply and thanks for the comments on the blog. 

I take it you have adequate sartorial advice now, so let me address your question about the hair. I’ve written before on the blog for balding men and the advice I gave (having consulted many experts!) was that close-cropped neatly-cut hair is best – very much as you have now. If you want facial hair as well, the same goes, closely cut and neat – however, if you feel a bit more flamboyant the style in the attached image works very well I think – a slightly longer beard. 

Image Alan Paine

As for hats, a beanie or a trilby may be the best options – but I wouldn’t rule out the flat cap simply because you’re from Yorkshire; why not celebrate it? The choice will depend what you’re wearing it with – trilby with suit, jacket and beanie with very informal and sports wear. 

I’m sure you’ve been advised that good fit is absolutely essential – ensure jackets fit across shoulders (go to a tailor for alteration if not), and avoid teen fashions like baggy jeans and t-shirts. You’re lucky in (like me, as a cyclist) having an athletic figure – use it! 

I hope that’s helpful. If I haven’t answered the question, or you have any supplementary, let me know; I’m very happy to help. 

Best wishes 

David

Grey Fox

Grey Fox's previous scribblings on baldness can be found here.

Gentlemen, we should be proud of our grey hair - why hide it?

Should any man using products to cover grey, silver or white hair be excluded from Grey Fox membership? I wouldn't use them, as I have an  instinctive dislike of fakery, but I appreciate that many will disagree with me. Certain hair colouring products are being sold hard here in the UK at the moment.

We should be proud of our maturity in middle age and beyond. To be otherwise suggests that we are easily  swayed by others' prejudices, and surely we're old enough to be our own men. Are products like these the enemy of Grey Foxes everywhere? What do you think?

Can you be a Grey Fox if you are bald or balding?

In her superb article on Grey Fox on The Times Magazine on 28 July, Polly Vernon wrote, "Grey Foxes are, by definition, still in possession of their hair. That is good." (Before you flame The Times, I'd hasten to point out that this comment was strictly tongue in cheek).

Of course a bald man can be a Grey Fox. Here are some bald or balding men whom we wouldn't have denied membership of the Grey Fox Club - each is stylish in his own way. (My apologies if I've infringed any rights with these photos, please contact me for removal if I have.)

Grey Fox Interviews Cirrus about hair and the middle aged man

For over 20 years I've had my hair cut by David Barnes of Cirrus in south west London. I tend to let him get on with whatever he thinks needs doing to my hair and he does a great job. When I first started going to him my hair was much fuller than it is now and there were no hints of grey - now things are very different. I assumed that, like the other parts of our bodies, out hair would need more maintenance as we grew older, so I asked David and his business partner, Nick, for an interview for some advice.

George Clooney - grey and stylish?

GF - David and Nick, tell me something about your business, Cirrus.

D & N - We're an independent hair salon opened some 20 years by David and a small team of uniquely talented hair stylists. Over the years the team has changed and evolved into the core of David, Grace and Nick; all grown-ups, long past our egos and desires to reconceptualize our industry, but still acutely style conscious without pandering to fleeting trends.

Jonathan Ross - yes or no?

GF - What changes do you see in men's hair as we grow older?

D&N - There are two fundamental and obvious changes - thinning and greying. Some men are lucky enough to experience neither, but that's all it is, luck!

GF - What can we do to look after it as we get older?

D&N - There are some simple rules for men wanting to look after their hair as they get older. Many men fix their personal style in their mid to late twenties and rarely progress from this. Middle age is not a time for long hair or experimenting with styles from the back catalogue (although Nick might argue against this one!) If you're thinning, keep hair short, don't for a minute think that by keeping the edges nice and thick or developing the much ridiculed "comb-over" that you will draw attention away from the lack of hair on top; keep it short! This is a time when the shaved head is a suitable look.

No colour for any reason whatsoever. And that's final. Having said all that, there is no reason why the middle-aged man can't be on trend or stylish. It's all about finding a hairdresser who will keep your style appropriate without inflicting their own sense of style on you.

Steve McQueen - the ultimate middle aged hair?

GF - Any products?

D&N - Good products are always worth investing in. There is a point of diminishing returns, but generally a salon-bought product will yield better results than your supermarket own brand. Two or three times a week is more than enough for shampooing your hair; a daily rinse in the shower is usually enough to keep fresh. And don't, please, believe that old chestnut about hair becoming self-cleaning after 6 weeks. Try it and see what your wife, friends, colleagues have to say about the theory! Like skin, if your hair is dry, moisturise with conditioner.

Styling products take some trial and error to get right. I personally think American Crew and Bumble&bumble products offer the best range of options. In particular, B&b's Grooming Creme is a great all round product. But please gentleman,avoid high gloss,greasy looks!

GF - So in summary, what advice can you give to help us make the right choices about hair styles as we mature?

D&N - There is, as we've said, no reason at all why the older man can't be of the moment. It's just that the moment is now and not 20 years ago. Well groomed is preferable to high fashion. Think JFK, Steve McQueen, George Clooney, even dare I say it, David Cameron! But not Nick Clegg, Jonathan Ross or George Osborne!

Not Nick Clegg?

Nice and tight round the hairline, a bit of length and texture on top if you're lucky enough, not overly groomed but sharp. Sideburns (for that's what they're called - sideboards are where you keep your china), should be, according to the seminal Esquire Handbook For Men, either above or just below your cheekbone; not cut straight off at the top of the ears in a Gary Numan institution style, nor proceeding down the face to a laboured point.

And there is no need for creative facial hair at this time. However, a full beard is completely acceptable but keep it as groomed as your head hair.

For inspiration, a recommended read is The Ivy Look, Classic American Clothing, by Graham Marsh and JP Gaul. It's all you need.

GF - Thanks very much David and Nick.  And dandruff........?